One Bitch to Another

I remember that when Leona Helmsley was in some deep poo in the 1980s, Newsweek had a picture of her on its cover with the phrase "Rhymes With Rich." This was before she was hauled off to the big house for a while.

Today I learned that Helmsley, who died about 10 days ago, instructed in her will that her dog Trouble will receive $12 million. The media are making a big deal that the dog gets money and some grandkids don't. Big deal: the testator has the right to do anything she wants, including not including particular descendants. So the grandkids have no leg to stand on, unless they can prove she was mentally incompetent when she signed the will, and that's long and messy. They'd be better off attending to other business, especially because Grandma did leave money to some other grandkids, who presumably would rather believe Helmsley was coherent when she signed her will.

Let's remember, as some professor told me in law school: Money+family=litigation.

My questions here are: What could possibly cost a dog $12 million over its life? How the hell much does kibble cost? Does this dog take vacations? Cruises? Does it regularly bathe in 14-karat gold? Does it live better than most American families?

Other than that, Helmsley planned and executed a thoughtful will, unlike, say, Anna Nicole Smith. But I wonder who the remaindermen are (those who stand to take if there's anything left after all claims and gifts are made), and whether they're plotting the unfortunate demise of Trouble right this moment.